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Referrals, Good. Favors, Bad.

There was a piece last week in a certain publication for actors that claimed referrals are a bad idea when trying to find representation. The argument was that when you get a referral, it's unlikely to go well, because the agent or manager doesn't really want to meet you, they're just doing it out of a sense of obligation to the person who referred you.

But in that case, it wasn't a referral to begin with. It was a favor. And it's important to know the difference.

A referral is when someone you know recommends you to someone they know because they think you could both benefit from the meeting. Referrals can come from another actor, an agent or manager, a casting director, producer, director, etc. Referrals work. When my previous voice agency closed their voice department, I was able to get a great new agent in just a couple of weeks thanks to a referral. It's like when you and a friend are meeting for coffee, and you invite another friend because you think the two friends will hit it off.

Also, referrals don't cost anyone anything -- the person doing the referring doesn't 'owe' anything to the person they're referring you to, because the benefit is mutualReferrals often happen naturally, meaning you don't have to ask for them. Instead, they're offered. In the case of my voice agent, I let people know I'd lost my agent, and a friend asked if I'd like to be introduced to his. Or if you ask a casting director with whom you have a solid relationship for feedback on agents you're thinking of approaching, they might say, "this one is great, let me know if you'd like me to refer you." You certainly can ask for a referral, as long as you're prepared to be refused if the person you're asking doesn't think both parties could benefit from the introduction.

A favor is when someone you know asks someone they know to meet with you, even though only one of you can benefit from the meeting. It could be an agent at an agency that's too big for where you're at in your career, or a manager who isn't looking for new clients, or a casting director who knows you're not right for what they're casting, etc., but they agree to meet with you as a courtesy -- a favor -- to your mutual contact. Favors rarely work. Sure, it's possible that the person will be so charmed by you that they'll think, "I'm feeling impulsive today, what the heck, let's do this!" (Whatever "this" is.) But most of the time, they either forget about you as soon as you leave, or worse, are annoyed that they spent precious time meeting someone they knew wasn't right for where they're at. That's why those meetings usually don't go very well. Also, favors DO cost something. If someone asks for a favor, they owe a favor in return. That's a lot to ask of a professional contact.

That doesn't mean you can never ask for a favor. It just means favors should be used sparingly. More importantly, get clear about what you want -- a favor or a referral -- and make sure that's what you ask for. Don't start a referral request with "I was wondering of you could do me a favor" (which actors do ALL THE TIME.) Ban "favor" from your vocabulary unless that's really what you want. 

And finally, only ask favors of people to whom you can return the favor -- meaning you have something that can help them too. That's good career karma.